I went through puberty, I swear!

My friend resorted to using her fake ID to get me into The Ugly Truth.

The movie is rated R. I left my wallet at home, without identification of any sorts as I was neither driving, drinking, gambling, or flying, and forgot that a Katherine Heigl romantic comedy would require anything more than a movie pass.

I should carry my identification at all times, though. The lady manning the weight room asked my age. I first nodded at my pass, which has my birth date, and then almost said 18, just because I was nervous. "I'm 20." The lady laughed and said, "OK, well as long as you are above 13, because you know, if you are younger than 13 you can't use the weight room."

Initially, upon AMC's rejection, I thought my friend, Emily, could fill the role as my necessary adult companion. But seeing as she was only 20, and the age to accompany minors into R-rated films is the same as the age to walk into any bar in the States, we resorted to begging. "Please, she really is 20, I promise!" "Yea, seriously, what are we supposed to do?" "I mean, I know she looks 16, but she's old enough to watch this!"

As it does in bars and casinos and border control, begging backfired. We stepped out of the line. After much contemplation, much deliberation, we managed to devise a plan to manipulate the system. Apparently, there were additional ID checks passed the ticket check, in front of the R-rated theaters. We decided to buy tickets to see Julie and Julia and then walk into the theater showing our sweet and not so innocent comedy. If at all we were to meet a bouncer, one of those bald, black, muscular guys employed to fend off underage teenagers, she would use her fake ID and I would be the minor accompanying her.

We managed to sneak into the theater unscathed. The film was perfectly crass, funny, and inappropriate for anyone under 15. I conceded to the theater's seemingly arbitrary policy of ID'ing; if I really were the age I looked, then this movie may have turned me into a child porn star, or confused me in the least.

When I do turn 21 (in 3 months, not 6 years), I will gamble, drink, and accompany some underage fresh mind into an R-rated comedy.

But until then, I will see all the PG-13 movies I can, and hope for the best.